Give lobsters the claw

I love lobster. And I love arcade games.

But, odd as it seems, I might actually side with People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals on this one: The Love Maine Lobster Claw contraption lets gamers at seafood joints and bars plunk down $2 to use a three-pronged, mechanical grappling claw to try to pull a live lobster out of a tank of water.

It's like those games you see in Wal-Mart where people waste their money attempting to fish cheap-o stuffed animals out of a big plexiglas box. And, as you can imagine, PETA -- which doesn't think anybody should eat animals (or even delicious giant sea bugs) in the first place -- is protesting the lobster game.

"Turning animal cruelty into a game is absolutely hideous," said PETA spokeswoman Karin Robertson.

I guess I agree. I don't like to play with my food. In fact, I'd rather not cook my own lobsters or shuck my own oysters or any of that, given the choice. I'd rather go to Swan Oyster Depot, where they take all the work out of the whole thing.